As a parent it is so easy to get lost in the daily frustrations. I find myself overwhelmed with the tantrums, the back talk and the day to day small fights. It feels like a personal attack. I forget that I have great kids. We had parent teacher phone call interviews and all my kids got rave reviews. Each teacher made a point of telling me how kind, how helpful and how much joy each of my children bring to their classrooms. At home I feel like all they do is scream and yell at each other and in turn all I see is them being mean to each other. It skews how I view my own kids and our daily life.
What it actually means though is my kids are outputting so much energy at school, playing with friends and all the other everyday stuff that they are spent when they come home. I have great children but my expectations of their behaviour at home is something they just cannot manage. It is so easy for me to see how I want them to behave and what I want them to do. It is much harder to remember to let them be, let them grow, let them learn how to be their own people. They are not attacking my parenting just because they are finding out who they are. Some days I want to have tantrums to and someday they will have to hold their tantrums in like I do. Right now they feel safe spewing their emotions in our space. I get to be that safe space. In this time of turmoil our home is still a safe place to love, be ourselves and have honest emotions.
I want you to remember on the hard days that you are loved, that you are a safe haven and that it’s not a personal attack. We are settling into new routines and from everywhere we are being asked why we have not accomplished more, learned something new or made something extraordinary. If you are just surviving in the day to day, I am proud of you!
Four Squared Motherhood 